How To Conquer Destructive Thoughts
If you follow me, you’ll know that I am passionate about being conscious and having a greater sense of ‘self.’ Both in your personal and professional life. And how being conscious of yourself in one – means being conscious in the other. So today I want to talk about being conscious of how we think – and how we can conquer destructive thoughts.
Living & Working Holistically
If you’ve seen the interview I did with Matt Quigley, he talked about how all well and good having success in business, but if you don’t have personal success with yourself – your business ultimately has no chance.
But if you are successful with yourself, success in business will come as a by-product.
This is working holistically. Making sure that you take care of yourself first, and the rest will follow – including success in business.
Take Care of You
This is why I think entrepreneurs have to be so, so conscious of themselves. If you aren’t self-aware and take the time to reflect, it’s very easy to miss things that are holding you back.
Working on yourself is key if you want to be successful. If you don’t have confidence in you alone – how are you going to have confidence in you as a business person? A manager? A salesperson?
It all starts with you.
The Critical Voices
We all have those negative thoughts. The critical voice in our head that tells us we aren’t good enough.
For me it might pop up when I’m about to go on stage to do a talk. And all of a sudden my brain starts saying: You’re gonna fuck up here. The crowd’s gonna hate you. You’re gonna make a complete fool of yourself.
It’s that inner destructive thought and voice that sometimes comes out of nowhere. Judging you relentlessly and giving you the worst possible outcome for things – that’s not even realistic half the time.
But you know what, I think that’s just normal. I think everyone has those voices. And the biggest thing for me in addressing them was realising that. Everyone has them.
And it comes in different forms for everyone. For someone else, it might be Yes, I know you have studied all week but you are *definitely* going to fail this test.
Or…you want to eat that brownie…you want to eat all of those brownies…go on…do it…
We all have those destructive thoughts inside our heads. But very few of us know how to deal with it.
So, I’ve mentioned this briefly before in my blog. My technique for banishing those voices.
So, I know it might sound crazy at first…but when I have those thoughts, straight away, I get up and stand in the mirror. I say; “Don’t you fucking dare say that again.”
And I say it so aggressively that I intimidate the voice into submission. I fight it, and I win.
So if the thought was you’re going to fuck up on stage…I’ll say: “you’re gonna nail this on stage.”
People aren’t gonna like you…I say: “People are gonna love you.”
It’s just this aggressive assertiveness I put out there when doing it.
And of course, I laugh at it, because it is a little “weird” some might think. But who cares? It works.
It’s so effective. And that’s the thing.
Confident vs Insecure
I’ve heard a lot of people say that they have this inner fight. A fight between the strong side and the weaker side within them.
And I actually think that what this practice does is take that fight out from the inside and brings it into the real world so you can face it and conquer those destructive thoughts that plague you.
For me it’s been really beneficial. I’ve gotten on top of a lot of those demons doing this. Which means – I’m winning the fight. And surely if so many people struggle with this – that must mean something.
This platform is all about sharing what I’ve found value in for myself, in the hopes that others can find value from it, too.
So hell, if fighting with myself in a mirror works for me…it might work for you, too. Who knows?
Give it a try. It might work.
And if you’ve any funny experiences like someone walking in on you mid mirror-stand-off – let me know, cause I’d love to hear about it!
Jamie has been a fantastic support to me across personal and professional challenges. He’s an expert consultant and one that I would highly recommend.
Jamie is a hell of a businessman, he’s got a lot of integrity, he has great acumen business wise and I am 100% behind him. We’ve done great things together and hopefully will again soon.
After working with Jamie for a few months, I ended up making more money in one month than I did in a year. Jamie White taught me how to run my business in a slow, consistent, efficient manner. He will help you change your life without having to burn out in process.
Jamie is passionate, personable, and has a commanding presence on stage. We’ve done good work together when I came to Ireland and I’m excited to work with him again in the future.
Jamie consulted with us and separately then spoke to over 1,000 of our staff at various events. His work brought us great value, he showed an ability to connect with novices and experts alike. Our team found him very knowledgeable, engaging and energising.
It is a pleasure and privilege to have Jamie in your corner when it comes to team building and development, his fresh perspective always enhances others’ experience and ensures teams leave feeling focused and inspired.
I worked together with Jamie on some projects in Ireland. A huge shout out to Ireland and Jamie. The work far exceeded my expectations and I can’t wait to come back.
I really hope you enjoyed this blog.
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